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: Post your rating system here  ( 7634 )
dave jenkins
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« #15 : November 07, 2014, 07:30:07 AM »

Quote
1/10 - Excrement
0/10 - Unwatchable Shit
I don't understand. Some excrement is watchable, but some is not? I follow the dictum: If it's brown, flush it down (i.e. shit is, by definition, unsightly). Apparently, Groggy can be entertained by his toilet bowl whenever his TV is on the fritz.

This reminds me of my favorite Star Trek joke: Q: Why did Mr. Spock have his head in the toilet bowl? A: He was trying to read the Captain's log. [Ka-ching!]

No, no, wait, I know an even better one: Q: The Enterprise got an all-gay crew. What was their new 5-year mission? A: Circling Uranus looking for Klingons. [OMG!]

Thank you, thank you. Come back again, I'm here all week.



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noodles_leone
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« #16 : November 07, 2014, 08:39:55 AM »

I don't understand. Some excrement is watchable, but some is not? I follow the dictum: If it's brown, flush it down (i.e. shit is, by definition, unsightly). Apparently, Groggy can be entertained by his toilet bowl whenever his TV is on the fritz.

This reminds me of my favorite Star Trek joke: Q: Why did Mr. Spock have his head in the toilet bowl? A: He was trying to read the Captain's log. [Ka-ching!]

No, no, wait, I know an even better one: Q: The Enterprise got an all-gay crew. What was their new 5-year mission? A: Circling Uranus looking for Klingons. [OMG!]

Thank you, thank you. Come back again, I'm here all week.

Now we need two new threads:
- Rate the last Star Trek joke you heard
- Post your Star Trek jokes rating system


PowerRR
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« #17 : November 07, 2014, 03:13:26 PM »

Now we need two new threads:
- Rate the last Star Trek joke you heard
- Post your Star Trek jokes rating system
;D

drinkanddestroy
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« #18 : November 08, 2014, 04:23:21 PM »

Maybe we should have a new thread where everyone rates everyone else's rating system


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This post gets Agnew's stamp of approval!


« #19 : November 08, 2014, 04:39:10 PM »

I don't understand. Some excrement is watchable, but some is not? I follow the dictum: If it's brown, flush it down (i.e. shit is, by definition, unsightly). Apparently, Groggy can be entertained by his toilet bowl whenever his TV is on the fritz.

Consider the difference between healthy stools and diarrhea.



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noodles_leone
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« #20 : November 09, 2014, 01:12:46 AM »

Yep. The South Park episode about iPads has a fascinating scene about eating regular excrements vs eating excrements after Chinese food.


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« #21 : November 09, 2014, 07:58:30 AM »

I more had Taco Bell in mind, but that works too.



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« #22 : May 10, 2017, 03:58:54 AM »

Just found this on Groggy's blog. Please note that it's quite close from my rating system so that's 2 of us and also D&D is very wrong.
http://nothingiswrittenfilm.blogspot.fr/p/about-this-site-and-groggy.html

Yep, that's pretty much where I'm at.

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« #23 : May 10, 2017, 04:36:50 AM »

But mine is better ... ;)

Groggy has btw "mediocre" by 4, and not by 5.

But, and that's the big essential question of mankind since the days of Noah (god never bothered to answer that), where's the useful difference between "awful" and "unwatchable shit"?


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« #24 : May 10, 2017, 05:07:12 AM »

But, and that's the big essential question of mankind since the days of Noah (god never bothered to answer that), where's the useful difference between "awful" and "unwatchable shit"?

The second big essential question of mankind being how much unwatchable something needs to be to become really enjoyable? I know for a fact that at least The Room passed that line with honor.


cigar joe
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« #25 : May 10, 2017, 07:18:18 AM »

Here is mine for general films which is similar to Groggy's initial posting :

0-4/10 = usually crap
5/10 = mediocre but may be bad enough to be good
6/10 = watchable
7/10 = decent
7.5/10 = good
8–9/10 = very good
9.5/10 = great
10/10 = excellent

For Westerns I give an extra rating point for beautiful sweeping landscapes or off the beaten path landscapes, Victorian machinery i.e., steam engines. locomotives, riverboats, hard rock mining or placer mining equipment, etc., etc. I give an extra point for picaresque style, and an extra point for believability of the story, believability of the characters, and they got to look weathered by the landscape. They lose an extra point or two if they are trying to be PC.

For Film Noir/Neo Noir I give an extra point for visual stylistics, and an extra point for great locations or archetypical locations. Believability in storylines in noir is not as important as in Westerns people do incredibly stupid shit decision-wise in Noir. Where believability comes in Noir for me is the characters they got to look for the most part life's survivors or down and out small time losers. They lose a point if they star celebrities du jour.


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drinkanddestroy
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« #26 : May 10, 2017, 07:38:35 AM »

My system is very similar to cigar joe's above (except that somehow he finds a way to give a 10/10 to 90% of noirs  ;)


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« #27 : May 13, 2017, 01:42:30 AM »

I don't rate any under 5 because if I turn a movie off I feel that I can't really rate having not stuck with it. I'm very trigger happy with the remote so anything not worthy of my time soon vanishes from my screen.

5/10 for me is a reasonable film.
6/10 is one that I am willing to watch again.
7/10 are ones that I would recommend without them being classics.
8/10 and 9/10 have been recognised by others and depends on the entertainment that I have got from them as to which is 8 or 9.
10/10 Absolutely essential viewing.


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« #28 : May 13, 2017, 10:25:54 AM »

I don't really rate movies, it seems a bit arbitrary to me. I either like a film or not. It doesn't really make sense to me to rate, let's say, a Russian silent movie, a Doris Day/Rock Hudson comedy and the latest CGI schlock fest on the same scale. Looking through the answers here, everybody interprets the rating system differently too. Some people consider a 5 crap, some think it means mediocre to OK. So frankly to me ratings make no sense.


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Jill
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« #29 : June 14, 2017, 06:21:16 AM »

1/10 - M. Night Shwhatshisname level
2/10 - Matrix Revolutions level
3/10 - why was this even made?
4/10 - I should have bought a pizza instead of a movie ticket
5/10 - had a few moments but it was either overall mediocre or a rushed, bad adaptation
6/10 - mostly mediocre. Might be ok with enough popcorn. It was probably 3D and didn't need to be.
7/10 - pretty good, or would have been meh but one actor saved it
8/10 - a good, solid movie, maybe not a masterpiece but definitely reatch-worthy
9/10 - almost perfect - usually only pulled down by a not-that-strong ending or one out-of-place actor.
10/10 - hell fucking yeah GO WATCH IT NOW
11/10 - god tier, the kind of masterpiece even the greatest directors only make once or twice in a lifetime


Examples:

1/10 - The live-action Last Airbender movie that doesn't exist
2/10 - well, as I said, Matrix Revolutions
3/10 - Blow-up. I will never forgive my film professor for making us watch this overrated crap.
4/10 - The Mockingjay (both parts). I almost fell asleep. The Hobbit trilogy falls around here too. Stop pulling out books into multiple, unnecessary movies!
5/10 - Lynch's Dune. It certainly had promise (great costumes, pretty good cast), but it was butchered by cutting out the entire middle part. Kind of a guilty pleasure. It's so hammy.
6/10 - average Marvel movie. I go in, probably enjoy it, but it doesn't leave much of an impression.
7/10 - Spellbound for the "pretty good", 1998 Les Mis for the "would have been meh if Geoffrey Rush didn't single-handedly drag it into a higher rating"
8/10 - Spartacus (the original one) - certainly not without flaws but overall very good and it aged well unlike most peplums
9/10 - The Lion King (if only the funny sidekicks didn't take over the middle), Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid (the known problems with there not being a definitive cut that would include everything)
10/10 - The Deer Hunter, the first 2 Dollars movies, The Life of Brian, The Empire Strikes Back, The Great Silence, The Prince of Egypt, Pulp Fiction
11/10 - The Seven Samurai, OUATITW, GBU, The Godfather I-II, Seppuku, La passion de Jeanne d'Arc


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