Sergio Leone Web Board
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
October 19, 2017, 09:36:19 PM
Home Help Search Calendar Login Register
News:


+  Sergio Leone Web Board
|-+  Films of Sergio Leone
| |-+  Other Films (Moderators: cigar joe, moviesceleton, Dust Devil)
| | |-+  Captain Apache
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
Pages: 1 2 [3] 4 Go Down Print
Author Topic: Captain Apache  (Read 16460 times)
Marco Leone
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 521



View Profile WWW
« Reply #30 on: October 05, 2005, 03:31:28 PM »

As promised..... here is my take on.......

CAPTAIN APACHE
"Ah aha aha ahaaaa - they call him Captain Apache".

"Well any film that provides you with an opportunity to hear Lee Van Cleef singing not just once, but twice has got to be worth a viewing" I thought to myself. "I'm sure it can't be as bad as I've been told". Well in truth it IS that bad. But it doesn't make it unwatchable! Lee Van Cleef plays an Apache Captain within the Army that is sent to investigate the murder of a Commissioner, and discover the meaning of the dying man's last words "April Morning".

It plays like a murder mystery in a western setting, with numerous characters introduced throughout that appear to have heard the phrase "April Morning", but are either attempting to solve the riddle themselves, or are shot before they can speak. These include gunrunner Griffin (Stuart Whitman), the blonde temptress Maude (Caroll Baker) and the equally teasing Rosita (Elisa Montes). And from a plot perspective, that is pretty much it (well, without solving the mystery that is!). Yes, it sounds very simple, but in actual fact the story is quite convoluted.

The soundtrack is hysterical - the title track in particular being so bad that you just love it - with Lee Van Cleef narrating to a tune so catchy that it would put professional purveyors of pop to shame! And you still get his rendition "April Morning" at the end of the film to look forward to.

Whilst it is quite poor Spaghetti Western fare, and a perfect example of the deterioration of the genre during the seventies, it does have three main factors that make it quite watchable :

1 - Lee Van Cleef himself - although this is a real LVC by numbers effort, the man has a screen presence that can rescue even the worst of films.

2 - The afore-mentioned theme tune.

3 - Caroll Baker and Elisa Montes (thats just the male hormones working! And anyway ladies, you get the bonus of a near naked Lee Van Cleef, so no accusing me of gawping!).

Aside from this, there are some other really good moments (Captain Apache insulting the two twins, the death of the Mexican General (played by Jose Bodalo) and a handful of other scenes that I chuckled at at the time but have since left my mind). At times the editing between scenes was quite poor (at one point jumping from Captain Apache in bed with Maude, to them discovering the hanging body of the key witness). Well hung!

Don't let me put you off watching it, because it is an example of a film being so bad its good. I would never have imagined however that Lee Van Cleef crooning would be the highlight of a film!

If you've seen it, and you want to cast your vote, it would be great if you could go to http://mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/spaghettiwesterns/reviews/captainapache.html and do so.


Logged

http://mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/spaghettiwesterns My Euro Western Website - (includes Reviews, Actor information and Spaghetti Western Generator)
pixelated
Gunslinger
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 212


perhaps.. i have a dream


View Profile
« Reply #31 on: February 21, 2007, 04:07:05 PM »

all i can say, is this movie fucking rocks


Logged

The Firecracker
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 9672


Rub me the wrong way, and I'll go off in your face


View Profile
« Reply #32 on: February 22, 2007, 05:29:02 PM »

all i can say, is this movie fucking rocks



Indeed.


Not exactly my greatest review (from "crappiest spaghetti westerns" thread) but here...


Review for "Captain Apache".



Their gonna tail em, trail em, try to nail em there...but WE haven't got a prayer.


"Captain Apache" is one of those films that is so incredibly awful that you cannot stop watching just to see what other atrocity it'll throw your way. It is also very entertaining becuase of its astrociousness(not a word).

The crap extravaganza opens to fake quotes(the last one is from Jesus) like...

"The only good Indian, is a dead Indian"

                                                   - Pale face saying

"The only good Pale face, is a dead Pale face"
                                                 
                                                   - Apache saying

"Love thy neighbor"

                            -Forgotten source

that last one is especially hilarious.

The quotes are followed by the theme song of the film and accompanied by several shots that are both future shots in the film and what one would assume to be an outtake. This gives the whole movie a early 60's western television show feel to it. Shows like "Rawhide" come to mind when seeing the intro to Captain Apache.
What comes after the intro is a series of rather strange characters introduced in different points of the picture. Lee Van Cleef looks like a featherless eagle as he plays the beardless Apache government agent, and if that isnt weird enough we have two strange looking twins as baddies, and a witch(yes a witch!). The plot is actually very similar to Orson Welles's "Citizen Kane", in that Captain Apache is assigned to investigate what the meaning of a dying government officials last words were. The last words uttered by the official were "April Morning". Every time the captain gets somebody to talk about "april morning" they are mysteriously shot out of nowhere(which is actualy quite silly if you think about it. How could this mysterious assasin be at the right place at the right time every time the Captain gets a lead?). Along the route to discovering the meaning of "april Morning" captain Apache must ward of the witch mentioned earlier and the evil twins. In one hilarious sequence the witch drugs Van Cleef for no particular reason and Van Cleef begins to hallucinate about a very colorful cave(which suspiciously look like the "Hell" set from the second film in the "Coffin Joe" series). After that trippy sequence there is an uproariously bad fist fight between Captain Apache and a pair of the witch's hired thugs(since when do witch's need thugs? It would have helped her image of being a witch if she hung around black cats. I would have liked a fight sequence with the captain against a band of nasty cats). The Filmmakers did nothing to try and hide the fact that Van Cleef was not the one fighting the two thugs. throughout the whole fight you can tell its a stunt man. later Van Cleef gets almost stark naked in order to speak to his Apache chief. The very sight of Van Cleef's muscular body fitting itself in a tiny piece of cloth covering his privates is enough to make me risk a heart attack from laughing so damn hard.

To make things even more ridiculous, the meaning of "April Morning" turns out to be a secret assignment to assassinate the president of the United States. Captain Apache of course saves the day in the nick of time. It all ends with Van Cleef singing "April Morning" on the soundtrack during the closing credits.

The funniest quotes Van Cleef ever used can all be found in this one film. Here are a few...

"You call me red ass too!!!!"

"Its full of snakes!!!!"

"teach me the ways of the white man"
 

Music: Top- notch, in a campy sort of way. The arrangement of the songs arent as bad as you would think though.

Actors:

Lee Van Cleef: Van Cleef looks like he is actually having a rather good time with the role, he hams up the part very nicley. I am surprised he never went into making straight out comedy movies(not just western comedies), all indication in this film shows that he would be perfect as a comedic actor.

Carrol Baker: Forever known for "Baby Doll", Baker plays her character "Maude" as a typical ditzy blonde. Her Main purpose in the film... well.....I am still struggling with that answer. One would think she would be a love interest for Cleefy but that doesnt seem like the case. She just hangs around until the end where she exposes some sort of care(or sympathy) for Captain Apache, and yet she calls him a "dumb indian". I couldnt tell you anything more.

the rest of the cast is all just playing off Cleefy and they are not worth mentioning.

Overall: I am not sure whether to take the film seriously or see it as an actual comedy. To defend it, I think it is a comedy(I hope). Either way this film should not be missed by Lee Van Cleef fans. You can pick up a copy for dirt cheap pretty much anywhere that sells westerns.

Or if you want  the crisp widescreen treatment you can pick up a copy at   www.Xploitedcinema.com


CRAP METER:9

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE:10

Logged



The Official COMIN' AT YA! re-release site
http://cominatyanoir3d.com/
pixelated
Gunslinger
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 212


perhaps.. i have a dream


View Profile
« Reply #33 on: February 22, 2007, 07:04:34 PM »

great review. i laughed my ass off through the whole movie as well... i find it especially funny that i mistakenly rented the "laugh track" release with the over-dubbed mock audio, watched the original first, and still found the original one of the funniest movies i've ever seen

i enjoyed it so much i'm tempted to get that widescreen release, but i'm afraid that it will ruin some of the fun to view it in any better quality.

i do wonder if the one i have is cut and how much.. there are several scenes where it just jumps from one scene to a new one, leaving me there like wtf? this happens during a couple action scenes, where it seems like a good opportunity for some nice gritty violence... perhaps they just couldn't afford the shots...

sooo many one-liners delivered perfectly by van cleef.

the alcohol fueled crazy indian beating of the twins was great...

 Afro

Logged

Banjo
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 4428


Don't you like music with your supper?


View Profile
« Reply #34 on: February 23, 2007, 05:40:06 AM »

Superb review Firecracker.
I hope you're gonna follow Leone Admirers lead and bring back your "obscure" and "crappiest" sw threads.
 Wink

Logged
The Firecracker
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 9672


Rub me the wrong way, and I'll go off in your face


View Profile
« Reply #35 on: February 25, 2007, 08:10:12 PM »

Superb review Firecracker.
I hope you're gonna follow Leone Admirers lead and bring back your "obscure" and "crappiest" sw threads.
 Wink


well in all honesty Banjo that review was ripped straight from my "crappiest" thread.

Logged



The Official COMIN' AT YA! re-release site
http://cominatyanoir3d.com/
New Brandon
Chicken Thief
**
Offline Offline

Posts: 30


View Profile
« Reply #36 on: February 27, 2007, 06:45:57 PM »

It's pretty rare to see a clean-shaven Lee Van Cleef, as far as I know.

I believe I own this on one of those budget eight-in-one two disc sets.

Logged
tucumcari bound
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 5812


Leone at work.


View Profile
« Reply #37 on: February 27, 2007, 08:30:52 PM »

I've never seen this. I'll have to check it out even though it sounds pretty bad.

Logged



"Everything revolved around her. The way Sergio looked at women - the way he looked at me..."
Ramon
Gunslinger
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 220


What are we going to do with this one Frank?


View Profile WWW
« Reply #38 on: January 18, 2008, 11:16:53 AM »

Captain Apache Thursday 31 January
11:50pm - 1:20am
BBC2
This is one of a series of ferociously violent westerns produced by a group of left-leaning American expatriates who fetched up in Spain in the late 1960s and early 1970s. Director Alexander Singer once made the now forgotten urban mini-masterpiece A Cold Wind in August, but he seems less happy here. Nevertheless, he makes excellent use of the landscape and manages to generate some real tension. There's also a bizarre supporting turn from English character actor Percy Herbert, who holds his own against such western stalwarts as Stuart Whitman and Lee Van Cleef as the titular native American warrior.
Tell us what you think
Email us at rtfilmcomments@bbc.co.uk to tell us what you think of this film. Your comments may appear in Radio Times magazine.
VIDEO Plus+: 396832
Subtitled, Widescreen
Cast
Captain Apache - Lee Van Cleef
Maude - Carroll Baker
Griffin - Stuart Whitman
Moon - Percy Herbert
Rosita - Elisa MontÚs
Snake - Tony Vogel
O'Rourke - Charles Stalnaker
Sanchez - Charlie Bravo
General Ryland - Hugh McDermott
Abigail - Faith Clift
Al - Dan Van Husen
Ezekiel - Luis Induni
Directed by: Alexander Singer
Filmed in: 1971

Logged

in these parts a man's life can depend on a mere scrap of information.

Ramon

www.fistfuloflocations.com
www.youtube.com/profile?user=swlocations
The Firecracker
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 9672


Rub me the wrong way, and I'll go off in your face


View Profile
« Reply #39 on: January 18, 2008, 02:02:25 PM »

Captain Apache Thursday 31 January
11:50pm - 1:20am
BBC2
This is one of a series of ferociously violent westerns



BBC2 must be mistaken.
This is a poorly made comedy.
No real violence or seriousness to speak of.
Could that synopsis have been written by the great (liar) Thomas Weisser?
Or perhaps it was somebody as equally uninformed?

My review...




Their gonna tail em, trail em, try to nail em there...but WE haven't got a prayer.


"Captain Apache" is one of those films that is so incredibly awful that you cannot stop watching just to see what other atrocity it'll throw your way. It is also very entertaining becuase of its astrociousness(not a word).

The crap extravaganza opens to fake quotes(the last one is from Jesus) like...

"The only good Indian, is a dead Indian"

                                                   - Pale face saying

"The only good Pale face, is a dead Pale face"
                                                 
                                                   - Apache saying

"Love thy neighbor"

                            -Forgotten source

that last one is especially hilarious.

The quotes are followed by the theme song of the film and accompanied by several shots that are both future shots in the film and what one would assume to be an outtake. This gives the whole movie a early 60's western television show feel to it. Shows like "Rawhide" come to mind when seeing the intro to Captain Apache.
What comes after the intro is a series of rather strange characters introduced in different points of the picture. Lee Van Cleef looks like a featherless eagle as he plays the beardless Apache government agent, and if that isnt weird enough we have two strange looking twins as baddies, and a witch(yes a witch!). The plot is actually very similar to Orson Welles's "Citizen Kane", in that Captain Apache is assigned to investigate what the meaning of a dying government officials last words were. The last words uttered by the official were "April Morning". Every time the captain gets somebody to talk about "april morning" they are mysteriously shot out of nowhere(which is actualy quite silly if you think about it. How could this mysterious assasin be at the right place at the right time every time the Captain gets a lead?). Along the route to discovering the meaning of "april Morning" captain Apache must ward of the witch mentioned earlier and the evil twins. In one hilarious sequence the witch drugs Van Cleef for no particular reason and Van Cleef begins to hallucinate about a very colorful cave(which suspiciously look like the "Hell" set from the second film in the "Coffin Joe" series). After that trippy sequence there is an uproariously bad fist fight between Captain Apache and a pair of the witch's hired thugs(since when do witch's need thugs? It would have helped her image of being a witch if she hung around black cats. I would have liked a fight sequence with the captain against a band of nasty cats). The Filmmakers did nothing to try and hide the fact that Van Cleef was not the one fighting the two thugs. throughout the whole fight you can tell its a stunt man. later Van Cleef gets almost stark naked in order to speak to his Apache chief. The very sight of Van Cleef's muscular body fitting itself in a tiny piece of cloth covering his privates is enough to make me risk a heart attack from laughing so damn hard.

To make things even more ridiculous, the meaning of "April Morning" turns out to be a secret assignment to assassinate the president of the United States. Captain Apache of course saves the day in the nick of time. It all ends with Van Cleef singing "April Morning" on the soundtrack during the closing credits.

The funniest quotes Van Cleef ever used can all be found in this one film. Here are a few...

"You call me red ass too!!!!"

"Its full of snakes!!!!"

"teach me the ways of the white man"
 

Music: Top- notch, in a campy sort of way. The arrangement of the songs arent as bad as you would think though.

Actors:

Lee Van Cleef: Van Cleef looks like he is actually having a rather good time with the role, he hams up the part very nicley. I am surprised he never went into making straight out comedy movies(not just western comedies), all indication in this film shows that he would be perfect as a comedic actor.

Carrol Baker: Forever known for "Baby Doll", Baker plays her character "Maude" as a typical ditzy blonde. Her Main purpose in the film... well.....I am still struggling with that answer. One would think she would be a love interest for Cleefy but that doesnt seem like the case. She just hangs around until the end where she exposes some sort of care(or sympathy) for Captain Apache, and yet she calls him a "dumb indian". I couldnt tell you anything more.

the rest of the cast is all just playing off Cleefy and they are not worth mentioning.

Overall: I am not sure whether to take the film seriously or see it as an actual comedy. To defend it, I think it is a comedy(I hope). Either way this film should not be missed by Lee Van Cleef fans. You can pick up a copy for dirt cheap pretty much anywhere that sells westerns.

Or if you want  the crisp widescreen treatment you can pick up a copy at   www.Xploitedcinema.com


CRAP METER:9

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE:10

« Last Edit: January 18, 2008, 03:54:34 PM by The Firecracker » Logged



The Official COMIN' AT YA! re-release site
http://cominatyanoir3d.com/
geoman-1
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 1163


In everyone's life there is a "Summer of '42"


View Profile
« Reply #40 on: January 18, 2008, 03:16:24 PM »

Wow. Thanks for the in-depth critique FC. Fascinating read.

Logged
Ramon
Gunslinger
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 220


What are we going to do with this one Frank?


View Profile WWW
« Reply #41 on: January 18, 2008, 03:25:02 PM »

You should be doing the BBC reviews FC, I didn't recognise their description either! I find the movie memorable from LVC singing the theme tune.

Logged

in these parts a man's life can depend on a mere scrap of information.

Ramon

www.fistfuloflocations.com
www.youtube.com/profile?user=swlocations
The Firecracker
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 9672


Rub me the wrong way, and I'll go off in your face


View Profile
« Reply #42 on: January 18, 2008, 03:48:49 PM »

Wow. Thanks for the in-depth critique FC. Fascinating read.


A copy and paste job from my own thread...

http://www.fistful-of-leone.com/forums/index.php?topic=2976.0

The reviews are just as bad as the films in my opinion.

Check out some of my better reviews here...

http://www.fistful-of-leone.com/forums/index.php?topic=3802.0

Logged



The Official COMIN' AT YA! re-release site
http://cominatyanoir3d.com/
The Firecracker
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 9672


Rub me the wrong way, and I'll go off in your face


View Profile
« Reply #43 on: January 18, 2008, 03:56:45 PM »

I find the movie memorable from LVC singing the theme tune.


Yes, I think the arrangement to the song is fantastic. The song used to be listenable through Shobary's site but apparently I can only download it to my jukebox. I'm not able to post it here Undecided

Logged



The Official COMIN' AT YA! re-release site
http://cominatyanoir3d.com/
Arizona Colt
Bounty Killer
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 1874


"Clear the ground of their traitorous feet!"


View Profile
« Reply #44 on: January 23, 2008, 11:21:48 PM »


BBC2 must be mistaken.
This is a poorly made comedy.
No real violence or seriousness to speak of.
Could that synopsis have been written by the great (liar) Thomas Weisser?
Or perhaps it was somebody as equally uninformed?

My review...




Their gonna tail em, trail em, try to nail em there...but WE haven't got a prayer.


"Captain Apache" is one of those films that is so incredibly awful that you cannot stop watching just to see what other atrocity it'll throw your way. It is also very entertaining becuase of its astrociousness(not a word).

The crap extravaganza opens to fake quotes(the last one is from Jesus) like...

"The only good Indian, is a dead Indian"

                                                   - Pale face saying

"The only good Pale face, is a dead Pale face"
                                                 
                                                   - Apache saying

"Love thy neighbor"

                            -Forgotten source

that last one is especially hilarious.

The quotes are followed by the theme song of the film and accompanied by several shots that are both future shots in the film and what one would assume to be an outtake. This gives the whole movie a early 60's western television show feel to it. Shows like "Rawhide" come to mind when seeing the intro to Captain Apache.
What comes after the intro is a series of rather strange characters introduced in different points of the picture. Lee Van Cleef looks like a featherless eagle as he plays the beardless Apache government agent, and if that isnt weird enough we have two strange looking twins as baddies, and a witch(yes a witch!). The plot is actually very similar to Orson Welles's "Citizen Kane", in that Captain Apache is assigned to investigate what the meaning of a dying government officials last words were. The last words uttered by the official were "April Morning". Every time the captain gets somebody to talk about "april morning" they are mysteriously shot out of nowhere(which is actualy quite silly if you think about it. How could this mysterious assasin be at the right place at the right time every time the Captain gets a lead?). Along the route to discovering the meaning of "april Morning" captain Apache must ward of the witch mentioned earlier and the evil twins. In one hilarious sequence the witch drugs Van Cleef for no particular reason and Van Cleef begins to hallucinate about a very colorful cave(which suspiciously look like the "Hell" set from the second film in the "Coffin Joe" series). After that trippy sequence there is an uproariously bad fist fight between Captain Apache and a pair of the witch's hired thugs(since when do witch's need thugs? It would have helped her image of being a witch if she hung around black cats. I would have liked a fight sequence with the captain against a band of nasty cats). The Filmmakers did nothing to try and hide the fact that Van Cleef was not the one fighting the two thugs. throughout the whole fight you can tell its a stunt man. later Van Cleef gets almost stark naked in order to speak to his Apache chief. The very sight of Van Cleef's muscular body fitting itself in a tiny piece of cloth covering his privates is enough to make me risk a heart attack from laughing so damn hard.

To make things even more ridiculous, the meaning of "April Morning" turns out to be a secret assignment to assassinate the president of the United States. Captain Apache of course saves the day in the nick of time. It all ends with Van Cleef singing "April Morning" on the soundtrack during the closing credits.

The funniest quotes Van Cleef ever used can all be found in this one film. Here are a few...

"You call me red ass too!!!!"

"Its full of snakes!!!!"

"teach me the ways of the white man"
 

Music: Top- notch, in a campy sort of way. The arrangement of the songs arent as bad as you would think though.

Actors:

Lee Van Cleef: Van Cleef looks like he is actually having a rather good time with the role, he hams up the part very nicley. I am surprised he never went into making straight out comedy movies(not just western comedies), all indication in this film shows that he would be perfect as a comedic actor.

Carrol Baker: Forever known for "Baby Doll", Baker plays her character "Maude" as a typical ditzy blonde. Her Main purpose in the film... well.....I am still struggling with that answer. One would think she would be a love interest for Cleefy but that doesnt seem like the case. She just hangs around until the end where she exposes some sort of care(or sympathy) for Captain Apache, and yet she calls him a "dumb indian". I couldnt tell you anything more.

the rest of the cast is all just playing off Cleefy and they are not worth mentioning.

Overall: I am not sure whether to take the film seriously or see it as an actual comedy. To defend it, I think it is a comedy(I hope). Either way this film should not be missed by Lee Van Cleef fans. You can pick up a copy for dirt cheap pretty much anywhere that sells westerns.

Or if you want  the crisp widescreen treatment you can pick up a copy at   www.Xploitedcinema.com


CRAP METER:9

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE:10


 Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin

Logged

Pages: 1 2 [3] 4 Go Up Print 
« previous next »
Jump to:  



Visit FISTFUL-OF-LEONE.COM

Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2015, Simple Machines
Page created in 0.041 seconds with 18 queries.